DDay April 6, 2010 Separated January 1,2013 Married 14 years Divorced September 2017

New Beginning...or another ending?

I have been a lurker on this forum since 2014 and have always benefited from the advice given. It's finally my turn to post.

I met the most amazing guy on August 19th. A dinner together where we couldn't stop laughing. Such good company and just a great person overall.

This was finally someone I could imagine a future with (after many years of dates that went nowhere) and I know that he felt the same way.

After a weekend together at the lake he come home very excited to tell his best friend about me/us. That was Sunday night. Yesterday he picked me up for a coffee during the workday, as he has done many times over the last two weeks.

It turns out that I went on a POF date with his oldest and best friend back in 2017 which ended in the friend and I fooling around back at his place. The friend shared details with my guy that I don't recall in the same way, but I didn't dispute them.

My guy (GT) acknowledges that I did nothing wrong - it was 3 years ago, we both have a past etc. however, he is really struggling with whether this can work for us as a result.

I told him that I really like him. I have no issue with the friend (or nothing that I would share with GT. I actually think the friend behaved poorly).

I said that he needs to sort out his feelings and that I hoped we could move forward from this; it would be a shame to let something so good end because of something that happened long before we ever met. We last messaged around 4 yesterday and I am leaving him to make his decision.

What do you all think? Guys, would this be a dealbreaker for you? Is waiting like this the right thing to do?

[This message edited by Freedom2013 at 7:53 AM, September 17th (Thursday)]

35 comments posted: Tuesday, September 1st, 2020