I feel ya. I didn't change my name when I married (thank goodness!!) BUT..... my middle name is spelled wrong on my birth certificate - hilarity ensues when dealing with any governmental agency about anything!!
In my current country, you have to register with the commune (village / town / city) where you live. That was ok because I had already dealt with my passport so my name was ok. But to get the residence permit, you need not only your passport but also your birth certificate and marriage certificate, both official certified copies within 3 months of the date of submission. So I got those, but then the powers that be balked about the different name spelling between my birth certificate and other docs. So then I had to explain that the spelling was wrong, then that explanation had to work its way up the food chain, etc....
And by the time they said 'ok', it was after the 3 month deadline so I had to re-get certified copies bla bla bla.
Same thing happened when I applied for citizenship here - there's a preliminary round of 'data collection' for all the docs, you send them the docs and they enter it into their computer, they send you back what they think you sent them, you have to correct any errors and re-submit, they look it over again and it takes so long that you have to re-get the stupid docs. You get the picture.
Anyway, several months and several hundreds of dollars later, we (finally!!) made it through the 'data collection' phase and into the several rounds of interviews and other administrative hoops. And became citizens here (and renounced US, that was another whole bureaucracy shitshow and several THOUSANDS of dollars......)
Why not just get a passport instead of Real ID? I imagine it's a similar amount of hassle but overall more valuable. Or is it that Real ID is going to become the de facto / de jure driver's license?? Or can you go to a social security office and get a card in your name? Might be easier....
Me (BS), Him (WH): late-50's
3 DS: 26, 25, 22
M: 30+ (19 1/2 at Dday)
Dday: Dec 2008
Wanted R, not gonna happen (in permanent S)
Used to be DeadMumWalking, doing better now